


Silences

by Inastiel



Series: Silences and Stars [1]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-23
Updated: 2014-02-23
Packaged: 2018-01-13 11:53:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1225339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inastiel/pseuds/Inastiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It wasn't supposed to end like this, but it did, and so the crew mourn the loss of one of their family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Silences

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the song Say Something by A Great Big World & Christina Aguilera.

It wasn't supposed to end like this.

Jim was so used to being shot at by hostile aliens and still managing to scrape out of danger that when an enemy phaser brought someone in the away team down it was a shock.  
Spock was there, shoving Jim behind one of the ruined buildings. Jim peered out from behind the shelter, looking for the crewman or woman that had been shot, when his eyes were drawn to a splash of blue sprawled on the dusty ground

_No._

Jim moved faster than he had ever done before, but Spock was faster. He wrenched his captain down as phaser fire almost took his head off, and somehow his grip on Jim's arm burned as it held him back from the brown-haired figure on the ground. He could vaguely hear Spock instructing him to wait until the hostiles had been neutralized, but all Jim could see was the red among the blue and _oh god Bones_.

Jim kept tugging at Spock's hold on his arm, trying to move, trying to do something, but Spock was almost certainly the strongest member of his crew and would not let go. Another phaser shot sounded, and then silence pressed down, heavy and cold and final.

Spock murmured something about it being safe now, but Jim was already collapsing on the ground next to McCoy, already searching desperately for a pulse, for something more than the stillness and the blood that had already stopped spreading.

Jim looked up at Bones' face and saw nothing, no life in his open eyes, just emptiness. Distantly he heard someone pronounce the CMO dead. A deep, wrenching hole opened up inside of him at the words.

"It wasn't supposed to be this way, it was supposed to be me, Bones, come back, please-" and he wasn't even aware that the words were tumbling from his lips, that his crew could hear, because his best friend was gone before he even had a chance to try and save him.

"Say something, Bones, please."

His crew - McCoy's crew, his family - gathered silently around their fallen CMO and their captain, tears staining dust-ridden cheeks. The pain was almost audible, grief visible in every set of eyes, even Spock's. Jim kept up his monologue, explaining in heartbreaking pleas why McCoy had to come back, that the crew needed him, that Jim needed him, but McCoy didn't respond and never would.

The crew kept their silence even as their Captain howled his pain into the red skies, even when Spock, his usually emotionless voice strained, contacted the Enterprise when the interference with the communicators cleared, even when they were beamed back aboard and the medics had to pry McCoy's body from Jim's desperate hands. The silence spread to the rest of the crew as their CMO's body was carefully taken to the sickbay, the Captain clinging onto his hand. Crew members respectfully stood back from the middle of the corridor and watched with tear-filled eyes as a part of their family was brought home for the last time.

The crew maintained their silence further, even when the Captain had to be forcibly separated from Dr. McCoy when he refused to leave his side, disrupting the medical staff's activities, maintained it even when Uhura ended up holding Jim as he broke down completely and the rest of the bridge crew laid comforting hands on his shoulders and spoke quiet words of support.

When Jim returned to the sickbay afterwards, eyes red and clutching his middle like he was afraid that what's left of his heart was going to join McCoy in the afterlife, the medical staff, his crew, his family, stood back and let him say goodbye. It was painful, and sharp, and so very quiet as Jim leaned over McCoy and brushed a kiss over his forehead.

"It wasn't supposed to be this way, Bones, but don't worry, I'm not giving up on you. I'll follow you, one day, and then we'll explore the stars together. You and me."

The silence continued for a stretch, a gift from the crew, and then:

"I love you, Bones."


End file.
